Coaching for responsibility and personal change

Hi,
in this blog my staff and I intend to give some information and material to think about, in order to better understand what living following “Life Coaching Philosophy” really means… focusing on the different aspects of Positive Psychology and on the concept of happiness.

We really wish the blog became a “place” where people can obtain resources at a “good price”: a free resource to start approaching the world of self-care, of personal development and, so, of Coaching.

Being able to effectively manage your own life presumes you have already found great answers. These answers, of course, don’t allow being what we are: everyone is different than the others, unique and unrepeatable.

One of my precise intentions is succeeding in showing you that “a certain change” may be a good strategy for growing up and get better… a further answer.

Why aren’t we able to achieve our prefixed goals and desired results when we deeply wish for something?

We can use this question in relationships (often little rewarding), communications (that give rise to misunderstandings and conflicts) and professional projects. Moreover, this is often accompanied by negative emotions: fear, anguish, frustration, feeling of guilt…

In front of these events, we usually answer ourselves to stay still and accept the event as an inevitable reality; we draw inspiration from fatalism, pessimism, bad luck, etc. or we take in consideration our power to change things from an optimistic point of view.

How to go along the second way?

We’re responsible for our life, but the word “responsible” gets often misunderstood in the sense that “we feel guilty in front of it”.

With this occasion, I want to suggest you to think about the literary meaning of the term responsibility: being responsible means being able to give answers. Reappropriating of something means buying your own power and your own freedom back.

We’re not always able to place ourselves in a positive logic (which is very dear to Coaching) that consists in self-healing before thinking of being an appropriate help and support to people.

Living your life with gratification, by nourishing and satisfying your well-being needs, is the basis of a joyful and fulfilling life; in other words, our well-being is conditioned by the way we answer to our psychological needs: we need to love and be loved, to reassure and be reassured, to be recognized, to find our place in the world and fulfil our project.

Try to think about your attitudes… about your way of managing these events:

Destructive attitudes
When you face any situation you tend to:

• Focus on errors, on the problem;
• Look for the reasons and the causes;
• Look for the guilty or the person who made a mistake;
• Blame yourself or whoever makes a mistake;
• Punish the guilty.

Constructive attitudes
When you face any situation you tend to:

• Focus on solutions;
• Involve people that are competent in the field;
• Look for crucial options;
• Use creativity;
• Appreciate alliances with other persons.

We don’t even need to say that in the first case energy is wasted, and the remaining amount of it is often so low that we’re doomed to failure almost for sure.

If that happened, try to change your answers!